In My Place

Some day...

2012-01-12T11:54:00.000+05:30

As I walk along the shores of the surprisingly silent sea…
my skin reflecting the golden glow back to the slowly sinking sun
a twinkle in my eyes ... tickle at my feet…
I realize how far we've come oh dear sea
Shore to shore ... Zone to zone we traveled
In our own respective realms

Together lets celebrate this moment of togetherness
Cuz tomorrow I start again.. on a different journey.. on a different route..
before I join you.. and be within you..
Somewhere..... Some day..... on a yet another peaceful day

Square peg in a round hole

2011-08-29T15:33:00.002+05:30

She picked up the triangular peg, and tried to fit it into the round hole.. not working.. she frowns and turns it to another angle, and tries to push it in again.... no luck... another angle.. and still not working... She looked around and found the remaining pegs, she picked up the square one this time, though it did go a little in, a part of it was still sticking out ... she knew something was wrong.. she tapped and turned and tried... and failed again.. she tried another shape which wouldn't fit in either.. I thought she would give up this time around... she luckily picked up the round one this time... she had that smile of satisfaction as she slid this one into the hole.... as I watched my little niece play this simple game... another thought crossed my mind...

Finding true love is just like above. When we start liking someone, we feel they are the right one for us. We presume that we would fit perfectly into each others lives. As we get closer to that person, we realize a lot of differences, which would lead us to the fact that we in fact do not fit into each others life. Some people give up in life, at the first sign of incompatibility or break up. Others move on and search for the right one, going through the entire ordeal again and maybe sometimes over and over again.

Some of us, try and fit into the wrong hole, expecting time to fill in the gaping holes in the relationship. Some others expect themselves or their partners to change slowly with time and mold into the desired shape. That hardly works most of the time.. and more often, some would prefer to convince themselves that things are fine... Finally there are the kinds, who do not lose hope, and continue to work on their pursuit of love. They succeed in the end, and they do find that one person who would fit in perfectly, into their life.... as a part of their life.

I know a lot of people who ridicule others who keep trying for that perfect person. They mark them as fools, who doesn't seem to learn their lessons despite the pain each break ups inflicts on them. They are are termed as non-adjusting and considered to be people who hold themselves in high regard. I personally regard such people with high esteem.

At least they do not get into a relationship expecting themselves or their partner to change over time. I admire their passion for true love.. and their trust in that person whom they have not yet met... I know there is genuine love and trust in other cases as well.... but there is an undefinable feeling that makes my heart flutter when I see such people succeed in their quest for true love... Sigh!!!

Turn around and look back

2011-08-10T16:13:00.001+05:30

She turned and looked back... and watched as the distance between them grew... as the vision of his image slowly diminished.. she watched until he was just another spot of dust in the air.

Not a great sight to see, and you know it hurts, but still you keep doing it. Every time we physically move away from our loved ones, be it your parents, siblings, friends or lover we always tend to turn back and watch them until they are too far to be recognized. It is a human tendency to turn back and look at people, at places and even trace back through the memories and think about times gone by. I've always tried my best to stop myself from doing it.. but each time.. subconsciously I end up doing the same. Its not just me, I have seen a majority of people doing the same act of losing your mind and scanning the distances trying to recognize your loved one's among the moving spots across the distance.

I've often tried to figure out the reason why I or for that matter anybody does that. Was it because of the uncertainty... the fear that this might be the last time you would be seeing each other ?? Well.. quite not, cuz most of the times, I would very well know when I would be meeting the other person.... Is it an act to try and re-live the moments just spent ?? or is it to just see your loved one's to your hearts content?? Well I have absolutely no clue at all.... though...Each time I do that, I have a mixture of emotions churning in my heart, feelings that are completely alien to me at other times, and they do disappear pretty fast, as you turn your attention to other things, like checking out the cute guy sitting across the isle ;-)

Whatever it is, I still haven't figured out the reason behind this looking back habit of me of many such people like me. Neither have I been able to decipher the assortment of emotions that gushes in as I do that. I try my best but in vain to stop myself from doing that. But time and again I keep repeating it, over and over again....

Any thoughts?????

A letter to a smartphone

2011-08-03T15:34:00.006+05:30

I so envy you, you flat faced palm-sized twerp. What is it about you that takes away all her attentions on me? I still remember the day she peeped into my soul and dropped those pebbles of love inside, whispering sweet thoughts of love and life and what not. She said I, and our love will be the most important thing in her life from then on.

Ever since you busted your way into our lives things changed. Gone are those days she used to jump around and pull me out just because she was bored and she had nothing else to do. And she doesn't seem to lose her way at all these days; how I used to love it when I used to guide her whenever she lost her way to places! I always loved to be the one to help her when she was in need and it always made me feel so special. And now, YOU seem to be with her everywhere, every time, helping her with anything and everything, and now I happen to be someone who needn't bother about it.

How I hate to envision you sleeping besides her, sharing the same pillow, feeling her so close that you can actually get the sweet smell of her. Do you know how it hurts when I know you see her undress in front of the mirror?I hate it when she kisses and strokes you, and holds you too close for even air to pass through, on the pretext of kissing her loved ones. I hate it when she laughs at all the silly gimmicks, of your stupid Talking Tomcat. With you around, she seems to be even networking while we watch movies. She is always so into you... she hardly pays me any attention even when I am talking to her, but with you ,she seems to be all ears deepening and confirming my thoughts that I seem to have taken a backseat in her life.

Well I should be the one to be blamed. Had I not introduced you to her, she would still be my sweet girl, pulling me off and hugging me tight, singing out loud, dancing her heart out, calling me up saying 'Am lost :-('. Playing wii games and watching movies. Well darling, enjoy while you can, cuz I will murder you sometime soon, and I'll see to it that I will never ever introduce her to any of your kinds.

Your end is nearing...

So GOOD BYE AND GET LOST!!!

Can't wait

2011-07-28T12:52:00.000+05:30

Can't wait to see that cheerful face,

can't wait to hear that chirpy voice

can't wait to to see those anxious eyes

and hold you tight!! until I sigh

Can't wait to feel your curly hair

and mess it up until you mother stares

can't wait to hear your little stories

and all the cute animations that you put in

Can't wait to hold those tiny fingers

or run around the house till we're thrown outside

can't wait to get wet in the rain with you

God am dying out here to just be with you

P.S : Am going home tonight!! will be meeting my lil niece after two long months!!!

and the pic was taken during her first ever Auto trip.. and man she loved it :-)

Of Stone benches and sweet little nothings

2011-07-11T15:12:00.001+05:30

I took a long walk today, a walk back to that stone bench, where we always spoke in silences; where we read each others thoughts on those puffy white clouds across the true blue sky,

Where we always watched the sun go down, and we celebrated another day of love!!

The walk was surprisingly longer this time, can't remember walking this far back then. I thought it was closer than this but then, well..this is what it is. I saw a couple down there, on our very own stone bench or so we used to call it ;-)

They sat there in silence, head to head, cheek to cheek, shoulder to shoulder, hand in hand.. Ah! just like how we used to sit!

I watched them as they spoke in silence, a language I know only those two would understand...I watched them for a long time.... cuz thats was all that I could do, I didn't want to disturb them.. to live my own memories all over again, memories of a good old sweet and innocent love....

They somehow reminded me of us, and the love we used to share.. of the days I read your mind before you spoke it out.. of how annoyed you would feel, cuz I always managed to read your mind... of the bubbly talks and bouncy walks...

I felt like I was slowly being pushed forward by some force...and I was moving closer and closer to those lovely lovers, I had this strong urge to tell them, to be together always and never let go no matter what.... I didn't know of it was a right thing to say to a complete stranger, but someone from deep inside of me wanted me to do that... I walked and crossed the bench.. and moved forward so I could be face to face with them... and what I saw left me dumbfounded, there I saw us... yes you and me, just like we used to be back then... right there in flesh n bones...I turned back... and ran down the road... back from where I came...only to realize, it was not just another walk... but a walk down my memory lane....

Lavender Lush

2011-07-05T16:57:00.000+05:30

Although Lavender is not the color that comes to my mind when you ask me what my favorite color is, I must admit there is something to it that always delights me.

I feel like an angel when I wear a lavender dress, although I know it is for others to decide ;-)

When I feel the need to be pampered and on my own, what I look out for is my collection of lavender candles :-)

Most of my nail paints have a touch of lavender in them.

When I think of something special for anyone special, they are sure to have a touch of lavender....

My favorite wind chime is the lavender one.

I know it might look like I am cheating on blue, but my dear blue you are too perfect for me to get carried away by lavender. We've been together for too long and If I were to leave you, I would've done that long time ago. I am in a beautiful relationship with lavender, a relationship which is beyond friendship and definitely not love. Although I must admit that sometimes I can't stop myself from being engulfed by the lavender lush.

The Picture

2011-06-17T14:53:00.000+05:30

It was a sweet little breeze... warm and soothing.. relaxing anything that it touched... it swept in through the open windows.. and peeped inside…the picture frame smiled as it brushed against the glossy shine, caressing the lovely, happy moments in the picture of good times...the frozen moments.. safely wrapped in the protective layer of glass... who swore to protect its precious one from all the worldly destructive forces... The lovely little breeze... teased the precious one... tickled it till it swayed... it was such a good sight to see... They played together.. giggling and shouting.. until they saw the storm fast approaching.. without a hint it knocked the breeze away where to? no one could see...

The glass and the frame shook with fear holding on to their precious one... they shuddered at the sound of its evil howl... but they stood there...firm and strong... like a true knight.. protecting their princess... willing to give up their lives if needed and thus fanning the sparks of anger of the insane storm... it storm blew harder... spitting stones of curses at the shining knight of glass... he was scratched, hurt and bruised.. but brave and unshaken was he... The demon in the storm grew stronger and wilder unable to take on the strength of courage....it looked around… for a sign of weakness... somewhere.. anywhere.. and there it saw ...the tiny hook.. holding on to her dear frame.... with her own life clinging over the small iron nail... with a dirty laugh of happiness the wind pulled hard at the only point of weakness... shaking it violently... until it gave up with a whimper... as it let go of its dear dear frame...

Alas!! our dear picture!! it fell with so loud a clatter.. that shook the entire world around it..rains of shattered glass flew around ... hurting the receding storm.. who went away victorious..leaving a gloomy air of silence behind... and there lied the picture... a hurting picture of happiness... overlooking the still frame that lay besides...with the only remains of its protector lying over it.. as a symbol of its last attempt to protect her... ...

Our dear picture of happiness... lay hurt and destroyed... but the spirit of good times lingered around it...... like a living world of hopeful dreams

I knew you would come by

2011-05-25T10:21:00.002+05:30

When I went to bed yesterday.. I wished I could meet you today

Cuz I was missing you so badly ..

I somewhow knew you would come by this morning

for the first time after soo many days I woke up with a smile

cuz I wasn't expecting you soo early..
never thought you would kiss me awake to a new day..

You left me in a state of trance with that comforting hug of yours..

with my eyes closed I lost myself to the beauty of that moment..

the relaxing scent of wet mud... the cool breeze of moist air..

the sweet kisses from those tiny little droplets of love...

You made my day dear rain... Thank You!!!

P.S. The weather is too amazing .. and am too lazy to work today :P

The Fall

2011-05-17T10:27:00.000+05:30

Like the leaves in the autumn fall

I fell to the pull of destiny

the feelings I had I can never tell

as I watched the distance grow farther away

As I lie on the ground lifeless and still

bearing the sharp and hurting prick

I lose no faith in the wind that will pass

The wind that will take me to the valley of hope

A valley full of conquered dreams

where over the river of life floats

a song of love n care and hope

I hope to come to life again

Sweet Dreamz

2011-03-15T14:30:00.004+05:30

You spoiled my sleep and don't you even dare to think I'll let you snore your way to glory... UP!! WAKE UP N TALK TO ME

He rolled over and looked up... NOOOOO plzzzzzzz.. am soo sooo sleepy... plz plz plzzz

NO WAY! you spoiled my sleep and I WILL see to it that you stay awake with me... EVEN IF I DON"T SLEEP AT ALL

He sat up.. frowning.. she sure has to have it her way doesn't she? Ok now what?? tell me.. you want me to sing for you? or you want us to just talk till 8 in the morning.. and then get ready and move to office? anyways you are used to not having much sleep... that doesn't mean you expect me to be like you.... I need some sleep else it might spoil my day..

He stopped as the shiny pearl drops dropped down her soft cheeks, as he watched she started to sob.. Its been a week since I slept properly.. hardly 3-4 hours I sleep a day.. am unable to concentrate at work.. I get irritated the whole day; you spoiled that 3-4 hours and went off to sleep. I never disturbed you all these days but I couldn’t take it today. Every day you make me stay awake for you and when it’s time for you to sleep you just turn around and doze off. Ever tried to understand my situation and tried to help me ???

Oh ok ok I get it.. am sorry.. Now we need to find a solution to this sleep problem of yours, there's no point in crying. I wish you could fall asleep at the drop of a hat like me. Let me try putting you to sleep today, it will help...

No, It’s of no use.. the harder I try to fall asleep the lesser I get close to falling asleep.

Well, you couldn't do it alone, so let’s try it together.

No use :-(

Trust me... let’s try...

Ok...

Now listen to me.. and close your eyes... close...

ok...

do you see us together in the beach?? mmmm... can you feel the golden sands?? yes.. do you see dreams floating close by?? No.. look out..I can see them.. beautiful dreams...oh I saw but they're far away.. Daz ok.. but you can see them right?? Yes.. now lets walk up to those dreams and ask them a favor.. we’ll take help from them to get you some sleep.. they will tell you their stories and help you fall asleep... they’re too far away from us.. we won't be able to make it... trust me... now take my hands.. and lets walk.... we don't have to hurry... lets just walk .. I want to walk through the water... alright lets walk through the water then... hmm.. the waters warm isn't it.. yeah... can I hold you tight?? mmm.. so he hugged her tight held her close.. so close that he could smell her hair..he spoke as he breather her in….I love the smell of your hair.... mmm :-) ... have I ever told you how much I love your hair?? the first time I played with your hair was when we were watching Someone like you.. I don't think you even realized it.. you were soo deep into the movie... and remember?? the first time I ever tried to tie your hair.. I am yet to master the art of tying hair I guess... do I still hurt you when I try to tie your hair?? sweets??? slept?? Already??? That was quick… baby mine…

http://www.bikesportmichigan.com/editorials/0000069.shtml

Far away she was floating with her dreams with him... ….baby we'll go back in the morning… am too sleepy now… Thank you.. and yeah we made it together

Between... this is my 50th post.. Although this was done a week ago.. I never published it.. since romance is what I love to write about .. I thought of saving this for this special post :-)

Our special innings

2011-03-10T16:03:00.002+05:30

Woah!!! wait a minute. Before all you cricket fans jump and read over I have to admit this post has nothing to do with the world cup and those of you who are looking for cricket contents.. move over boys.. this place has no posts on cricket.. not that am against cricket or something..

So lets get back to our innings...

Sorry folks quite a loong post ahead.. this must the longest one I've ever written :-)

Scene 1 : 21st Feb 2011 2:20 AM

2:20 in the morning and as expected I was floating ... in deep slumber.. at peace... moving from one dream to the other wish life was soo smooth... until I was taken back to reality by the sound of my phone. What the hell! Don’t we have the freedom to sleep peacefully at this hour?? If it is my irritating manager again am gonna wack him to death.

One look at the phone and I was puzzled; it was my apartment mate...the early to bed and early to rise kinds unlike the other crazy lady who would've been awake even at this evil hour had she been here.. I thought I was dreaming..n so as I picked up the phone.. in my dreams .. I heard Zee stammer.. and I couldn't make out anything.. I got a little puzzled and concerned and decided to go and check her in her room.

Outside my room the scene was sort of harrowing; it reminded me of a murder mystery movie I saw a few days back.. there were 2 bed sheets lying in line across the the hall.. as though it was dragged along with a maybe a body??? and the main door was left WIDE OPEN :-O

I knew something was not really alright and I didn't have the courage to walk up to her room... instead I called her up and she started blabbering again.. somewhere in between I managed to make out 'ran out... ground floor.. watchman' and finally I realized that I was ALL ALONE in the house with some murderer in the loose.. I ran for my life

I met her downstairs, there she was looking like she's just had a nightmare ... I ran upto her and asked her if there was a murderer in the house... and finally she told me that it wasn't a murdere but..a BAT ...was a BAT in her room.. the poor(scary) thing came in through her window strange and it hit the fan.. hurt itself and fell down.. the lady was too scared and ran out.. for her life.. she jumped out of her bed and ran for her life..

After a lot of convincing I finally got her to get back to our apartment, the door wide open.. bed sheet lying stretched in the hall.. God it gave me that creepy feeling again.. we slowly lurked into her room... I jumped in switched on the light and jumped back in lightning speed... then slowly.. we got inside the room n searched high n low for the bat.. and the hero was nowhere to be seen...

But poor Zee was too scared to sleep in that room on her own.. worried if the bat might again drop out of the blues onto her... so I offered her a place in my tiny room.. and finally the eventful night came to an end.. like Geet in Jab We Pet.. I prayed to God to make this night less exciting... rather boring...

Scene 2: 21st Feb 2011 8:40 PM

I never imagined God to take my prayer so seriously, the following day was the most boring one I ever had. Once I was back home, none of my apartment mates were back. Boredom kept staring at me with a smirk, I prayed to God to make the rest of the evening a little less boring or rather exciting :-) .I was flipping through the channels when I saw this vampire soap in Star One. Oh my! the guy did look like a forbidden fruit, a typical vampire feature I guess :D . So what if he's a vampire, he can't get out of the TV and bite me, hence I decided to feast my eyes on that man who looked like a blessing for the female breed :-) . The sequence of events were far too predicable, mid night... new moon.. the howls.. was I scared?? no way.. until I heard a noise in my room.. As I looked up.. something or rather someone landed PLOP on my feet...

... there it was the hairy little mass of flesh lying on my feet.. I froze as the vampire/werewolf howled in the serial... with the bat at my feet everything looked soo realistic... I tried to scream but I couldn't ...I wanted to run but I couldn't even move a finger.. slowly as my senses got back to normal I rushed out of the house... well Zee, now I really know what you went through last night I won't mention the bed sheet ever again. I threw both my slippers at the bat from outside.. just get out of my house you devil?? finally after a lot of struggle the vampire got out.. and flew away.

When Zee was back home that day, I told her, to her horror that we were in fact, sharing our room that day with the very bat fearing which she decided to share my room.
I was in splits as I narrated the story to our third apartment mate.. We personally enjoyed the 'bed sheet' part of it all...but to be honest that was one hell of an innings...

P.S. I was the third roomie.. the incident happened when I was away from home.. lucky me :-)

Hello Sunshine

2011-03-04T17:26:00.000+05:30

Hello Sunshine,

I know you are aware of the fact that I haven't been really fond of you ever since I finished schooling.
After maybe more than a decade, I felt like being with you today. Strange, a lot of things have been changing in my life these days, so am not really surprised. Today I soo wanted to be with you. I wanted you to shine down on me..I want to look straight into your eyes and not shy away from you... go for a looong walk with you... perhaps we can walk upto the beach.. but there are no beaches in hyderabad. I might have to get back to Kerala so we can walk along the beach.. now that its not possible immediately..

I wish we could atleast walk across the street through that narrow deserted lane. Not much of noise and I usually don't see many people there.. We can stop by that small tea-shop and have a small cup of ginger tea and talk about just about anything.. or else we could walk in silence, I don't really mind doing that, am usually not a silent person but you know what?? I read somewhere that people who can communicate in silence are the one's who understand each other the most. Am not sure if I really understand you. I've avoided you for too long, I've been too selfish.

But I really wish from the bottom of my heart if you could come for a walk with me... for old times sake... cuz I really don't know why I really feel the need to be with you today.

Yours,
Sigma

Celebrating Love

2011-02-14T12:58:00.002+05:30

He: WHAT?? What are you frowning at'??
She: Nothing
He: Oh come on now tell me what??
She: Oh!! Its supposed to be a surprise for you... so I can't really tell you what.
He: Ah ha!! lemme guess now.. you are confused .. bout what to gift me for valetines :-)
She: Not fair... you always guess whats running in my mind.. not done..
He: ha ha... baby I read your mind and I understand each and every move of yours.... and thats what bought us together.. and let me ask you a question.. do you really need a specific day to celebrate our love??? aren't we celebrating it each n everyday??? and do we really need a reason to exchange gifts?? and what makes you think you can gift me something better than what you already blessed me with?
eh??? :-| what special gifts did I give you?? they were all so ordinary ...

and he pulled her onto his arms and held her tight.. and then he slowly lifted her chin and cupped her tiny face in his hands and whispered 'You are the best gift I can ever ask for' .. and they kissed.....

Love is a wonderful feeling!!! and being in love is a celebration in itself. So all you ladies and gentlemen who;s never been kissed by love... never lose an opportunity to be in love...for.... There’s no better way to bring happiness in your life!!

Wish you all a very Happy Valentines Day!!!

Sometimes and Those times

2011-02-03T00:17:00.000+05:30

Sometimes in life... I felt like life was sinking...

Sometimes in life... I lost all hopes..

Sometimes in life....my best plans backfired...

Sometimes in life.... I got caught in the flood

Sometimes in life... I thought I was alone

Those times in life... I learned how to float ;-)

Those times in life... I never lost faith

Those times in life... I always had a backup plan :P

Those times in life... I always went with the flow...

Those times in life... my friends came looking for me...

Sometimes are frequent visitors in life... you don't have to run away or hide from them... the best way to tackle them is to treat them with Those times!!!

Friendship isn't a big thing.....

2011-01-28T12:20:00.000+05:30

Oh my my don't get deceived by the title.. I haven't completed that yet... the saying goes..

Frienship isn't a big thing... its a million little things... Came across these lovely words on this lazy afternoon. Soon after I had a hearty conversation with the only person who understands and relates with the cranky side of me...

$halini: enikku bore adikkunnu, joli cheyyan madi aakunnnu!!!!
           also, urakkkam varunnu :P
me: same pinch :P
       am feeling exactly the same.. am bored.. lazy, in no mood to work.. and too sleepy myself...
       am controlling myself
$halini: sho.... nammude oru karyam! :P
me: lol seriosuly..
      ivarkenda lunch ine shesham power nap ine time thannaal?
      it increases the productivity
      ;-)
$halini: seriously!!!!
           perhaps they know, power nap becomes forever nap! ;)
me: lol ..
      they shd have some plan to keep that in place..
$halini: absolutely!

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one." ~ C.S. Lewis

and in our case it keeps happening each time we meet/chat/mail..

What do I tell you about this extremely special person in my life???... each time I flash back on my past... the memory that has consistently made me happy.. had been that of my school days.. and the one funny face that keeps popping up when I think of school is Shalini...

We've been friends for more than a decade .... and each time we are together... we feel brand new.. there's a special freshness around our friendship that I really can't talk much about...cuz I really do not know why or how it feels that way... maybe its the ease in which we relate to each other ..I mean... I've quite a few friends who needs to be acknowledged.. who needs to be told every now and then that they are special and close to my heart for them to be sure am there for them... I'm basically not a person who is really very expressive... there are very few people with whom I'm comfortable expressing myself.. strangely Shal doesn't fall in that list.. so what?? she doesn't really need to be told I love her or I'll be there for her.. even if I ignore her for months or rather years together.. it will not lead her into thinking I've totally forgotten/ignored her.. she'll presume that I'm busy and will get back asa am done with things.. but there's flaw in there.. what I really want to get rid of her?? God I will have to really convince her then... ;-) kidding shal.....

So today I would like to raise a toast for that special person in my life who needs no recognition/appreciation/expression to know how much I love her and value the special relationsip we share... the special times we've spent and the one's that are yet to come... love you shals..

3 cheers to our 'Seriyaana lose' companionship!!! >:D<
P.S : Shalini had requested me to write a poem in malayalam in fond memories of the atrocious remix peom that I wrote to bunk a unit test back in school... So be prepared to be petrified!!!

Love is immortal

2011-01-22T00:26:00.004+05:30

He took another long leap... turned back and asked her....

You know whats the biggest problem in love??

The good guy always gets the wrong girl...

and the good girl always gets the wrong guy..

They fall in love and the good one's get cheated..

and now the good guy ends up thinking all gals are frauds

and the good girl thinks all guys are flirts...

Finally when the good girl meets the good guy,

they avoid falling in love with each other

and try their best to be just good friends....

But with time.. they realize that they are in fact very deeply in love with each other...

and now.. since they've already been cheated, they chose to remain as friends and stops themselves from letting each other know each one's feelings.. and finally.. love dies..

She walked up to him looked up into his eyes and asked 'What happens when the good girl and good guy tell each other of their feelings??? See love remains and lives in that case!!! '

He stared back into her deep brown eyes... they looked soo happy.. and confident.... he looks away and says..... 'Well it does die then as well.. they will sacrifice love for family/career/society.. anything.. and then love dies'

her eyes wandered. all over his face..... but love never dies baby... as its immortal.... people might part ways..priorities might change... but the love ... love still remains.. somewhere deep down within you... in some corner where you wouldn't bother to look at... and one fine day you might stumble upon it.. only to realize it was still there... so much alive!!!

P.S : The beginning of the post was actually a forward message :-)

Pure

2011-01-10T23:57:00.002+05:30

You set me ablaze.. without a warning... .

and I feel myself burning..

burning with passion..burning in love...

N that feeling!!..Oh that special feeling…

a feeling beyond comfort.. a feeling beyond pain

a feeling…so wonderful, elite and pure

for along with it burnt my feelings of hatred,

vengeance and envy…. and all such

heinous feelings residing in me

I burnt bright like the glowing sun..

and I feared so much if I would burn you out...

but this feeling Oh! this wonderful feeling

which reduced me to ash…from which

I rose… like the phoenix…..

So divine… so virgin

For I've been touched...

by a touch so pure.. so healing..

a touch that finally purified me

To tie up a baby

2010-12-21T00:18:00.002+05:30

COME BACK HERE... COME RIGHT BACK ... ELSE AM TELLING YOU I WILL BEAT YOU UP!!!!!

She turned back and gave that puppy-eyed look at her mom ran to the other room...Its 1:25 AM and my lil niece still shows no signs of getting to bed... My poor elder sister had a busy day and was soo looking forward to crash from 9:30 PM :-)

oh yes she has been trying to put her lil baby to sleep for the past 4 hours... but in vain. I didn't even try to offer a helping hand as I knew very well when am about to lose a task

:-D

Me and my younger sis were..watching the show … giving each other those suppressed grins..... though both were engrossed in our own private networking world.. and all of a sudden my younger one looks up and asked..

P2 : Hey ... what would you have done.. if you had a kid who kept you awake, and ran around the house on the most tiring of the days when you really really needed some rest??

Me : Let me see.. aaah... I know what I'd do... I will tie her to the cot just like how I tied you when you were a kid ... he heee

P2 : WHAT??????

Yeah ... I did tie up my tiny lil sister to her cot the one time I soo badly wanted to watch my cartoon show and when I was forcefully made to baby-sit my 9 month old lil sis... who used to crawl around like a turtle.. oh not a turtle she was faster that that.. Well I had no choice but to pick up a dupatta (I did chose the soft cotton fabric so it didn't cut her skin) and tie one end to her legs and the other to the bars in her cot... and it was bliss...and believe me its not harmful and they stay where they are when you do that.. you needn’t worry about them wandering off to forbidden lands and getting hurt or disappear like there was a black hole or something hidden in the house.. I watched the entire show and yeah I did enjoy it.. but the experience post that was not really pleasurable ..and well.. thats not to be disclosed.. well... I've got something to say in my defense.. I was tiny kid as well...

Keys misplaced and Lessons learnt

2010-11-29T18:11:00.001+05:30

Who ever has designed the keyboard needs to be spanked... for keeping all the wrong set of words besides each other.. especially when its been used by people like me who thinks its am great cuz Itype fast, leching at the new hot guy in the floor, without batting an eyelid.. not even looking at the screen and finally hitting ctrl+enter without even giving a ~~first~~ last look at the screen.

So what happened?? well the alphabets 'C' and 'D' were so closely placed .. ah I can see you guys looking at your keyboard.. do that please... so that you don't end up in a situation like mine... oh so where were we??? yes.. C and D .. so for the mail that I sent to my entire team.. D was placed instead of C for the most vital part of the subject line..

And here I was .... sitting and chatting with the guy besides me oblivious of the malicious mail that has just left my inbox when I get a ping from my lead

K: Oh! so you can't wait till 9 to get into a disco eh??
Me: Eh?? I didn't get you
K: I knew it.. where's your mind girl?? :-) check out the mail you just sent to the whole team... lol

I didn't have to check my mail cuz by that time I had all kinda pings from the entire team.. another set of teammates roaring at the other end... another guy was singing 'Its the time to disco' the only compassionate friend pinged me the entire content. 'Unable to connect to Disco; Please mail me in case of any issues'

So.. that's it... lessons learnt?? yeah quite a few.

Having the spell check on doesn't always work while sending mails.. so please read through before you press ctrl+enter
Always look at the screen ( if not the keyboard) while you type.
Last but not the least NEVER lech at men while attending to official mail/calls.

Ripples

2010-11-14T20:56:00.001+05:30

I lose control over myself..
as the waves of your love..
ripples around me..
Please hold me tight... lest I fall again...

A celebrated vacation!

2010-10-26T10:35:00.001+05:30

There I was sitting in my cottage, minding my own business …. Absorbing the beauty of the famous hill station Waynad. I wasn’t really sure how or when I landed there… guess I’d packed my bags in a hurry and started off without informing anyone.. like I always wanted to.

As I was sipping out the last drop of tender coconut water, ‘Hello… would you mind if I join you??’ I looked up and was sort of surprised to see Vivek Oberoi standing next to me… ‘Sure, why not??’ he sat there and there he goes talking about his upcoming marriage and his new release ‘Raktha Charita’ so after almost an hour long conversation which broke my own hearty conversation with the nature he decided to take me to the movie himself… so that I can see for myself and believe the movie’s just out of the normal.

So there I was watching the movie with Vivek Oberio besides me… the movie… was quite out of the box… too much of violence, and it was quite disturbing and I was praying for the movie to come to an end before the expected 3 hours. Come on I didn’t come o Waynad to go and watch a movie where people act… I came to watch the nature where the people and things are soo natural… I needed a break from the normal life where people act in front of each other to be in the so called good-books of whoever they wanted to be.

So I rush out after the movie, thank Vivek and rush back so that after all those torture to my eyes, I had to sooth it with nature therapy J I fell asleep sometime between and was woken up by another intruder.. ’God NO why can’t I have a peaceful vacation??? Why don’t people just go around and mind their own business??’ I looked back and I was perplexed at what/who I saw.

There he was Surya, right there in front of me… in flesh and blood.. Wow!!! Now that’s what my eyes needed after all those torture I thought.. nature therapy yeah… what a bliss . I could feel my knees go weak and I was too mesmerized to react as he started speaking…. Usually I’m good at hiding my excitement when it comes to some cute guy… but this time… it was way too evident that I’ve lost all my senses to him which made him feel a lil uneasy.. But that’s okies… I was back to normal in around 15 minutes and I started talking.. about how I loved his movies, of how I loved his looks, of how I always used to have him in my desktop background, or how I love his eyes and how I always see romance oozing out of those roving eyes…. At the end of which he decided show me his new flick of ‘Rakta Chartia’ eh?? Well??? I’ve seen it but then.. watching it with Surya?? I made a quick apology to my eyes and willingly said I’d go for it… and as we started off for the movie… my bloody mobile started ringing… nooo I thought I’d switched it off..

As I picked my phone.. well… I could hear my sister on the other line.. and slowly things came back to where it was… I was lying on my bed, in my room… How I wanted to strangle her… byt why God why??? Why did you send Vivek first?? Why not Surya?? And just was I was about to go out with Surya you woke me up.. not fair… I never fancied Vivek still you sent him to my dreams…. And just as my dream boy walked in you had to shake me out of my sleep… not fair… and its really NOT DONE.

The Stupid that I'm

2010-10-22T22:39:00.004+05:30

Friday morning and I wake up late.. am lazy to get out of bed... I lied there staring at the ceiling for some time... coaxed myself go get up and do my morning chores..
At the end of it with just the shower remaining in the list I decide to sit and relax.. so I went online.. posted something on my best friends wall... Went through all the crazy update from all the crazy people in FB and then I log into gtalk.. and spent another 1 hr chitchatting with friends..

Finally I see the time and I realize am already 20 minutes late to work.. so I call up my lead and let him know I'll be a little late to work... then I got the water heated.. had a luxurious shower and dress up... again lazy.. so I listened to some peppy numbers to get the pump and finally I got the push I needed and set off to work.

So I reach office.. and I see my lead was anxiously looking at me as though he's met his long lost sister. He came up to me and said.. 'You said you'll be a lil late.. this is more than a lil' To which I smiled and wished him a Very Good Afternoon :D and so he tells me about some urgent task which needs to be done before the call which starts in 15 mins.. No worries... I 'll just get it done and I open my bag to pull out my laptop and then! there I was staring into a blackhole.. I looked again... and put my hands inside and checked ... I thought maybe I went blind all of a sudden.. see it was soo sunny outside so maybe all of a sudden my eyes couldn't take the dim lights inside and hence went blank... oops my hands couldn't feel anything either.

Surprise surprise!!! I just realized that I'd left my laptop back home and just carried the empty bag to work :-D
As my lead stared at my confused and horrified face I showed him my bag.. sure he could't believe it either.. 'How could you??? didn't you even feel that you bag was lighter as compared to the other days??' To which I grinned and pushed my colleague aside in a hurry to finish the job which was supposed to be done in 15 minutes and now I had hardly 7 minutes left.. and I jumped into action my lead roared with laughter to the horror of my poor teammates who were unaware of the turn of events..

So as I sat there finishing my work.. I had my entire team or rather the entire bay laughing their heads off at me for the making the impossible possible, well I could atleast give them their share of friday fun at work :-)

P.S : Those who are not aware of how forgetful I can get... do have a peek at an old post I forgot something

Courage & Fear

2010-10-17T16:54:00.000+05:30

Ever tried to stop someone from hurting you? moved out of a hurting and dying relationship?? ever told someone very dear that their acts of love were in fact straining the relationship instead of making things better???

It takes a lot of courage to do that doesn't it?? but have you observed that it is in fact the fear that actually brought out the courageous self in you? There is in fact no courage without fear... courage is that which conquers fear... Courage doesn't mean you don't see the difficulties and dilemmas attached to the situation; courage is your willingness to face the difficulty and cross the hurdle and reach your destination in spite of the fear in you.

It takes courage to end an unhealthy relationship, to quit an unsatisfied job, to ask for what you need and want out of life. It takes courage to be honest to others and to one's self. It takes courage to go against your loved one's to live your dreams.. it takes courage to liveSo all of you out there, its time to let courage and not fear rule your life.
Because as Holly says
"This is my one and only life, And its a great and terrible and short and endless thing, and none of us come out of it alive"

So why give up the best and the most tempting things in life for fear???

Did he get all that he asked for???

2010-10-08T16:50:00.008+05:30

Raj is a friend of mine who was travelling overseas on a job assignment with another set of colleagues to join a few others who were already settled. He was all set, he'd shopped till he dropped, had all the paper works in place, Forex was also in place.. whats next?? Just as he was beginning to think that there's nothing left to do POP pops a mail.

He couldn't believe his eyes, neither his mind... he thought maybe he was hallucinating! how can this be?? may be all those shopping had made him imagine such things... as he confirmed the reality of the same with my forensic examination, I thought this was one topic worth sharing with you all.. so here we go the contents are given below with changed identities.. you see they're afraid if others might write them such mails in the future ;-)

Team,

Rajesh and Rajiv requires the below stuff from India. All together it’s coming around 12-13 Kgs.
We team of 13 people from Hyderabad should be able to do this.
I have randomly distributed the stuff below (Each one not exceeding 1 Kg per person). So please buy the stuff which is against ur name and carry it

2 Kg Moong Dhuli Sairam & Bondhuram
2 Kg Arhar Rajashekhar & Abhay
3 Kg Urad Dhuli Arjun & Abhimanyu
1 Kg Chana Daal Hariharan
2 Kg Rava Ajay & Gunashekhar
Masala papad—6 Pks Ravishakar
Priya Non-Veg Curry Masala Paste—10 Pks Ramesh
Semiya-1 Kg Raj
Cloves – 100 GM Vikram
Elachi -100 GM Ajay

Thanks,
Venu

Oh yeah it did really happen and he did spend ample of time planning over the above matrix. So next time you know someone's travelling... you know how to plan ;-)

And if you ask me if they did get all those things?? well.. you really think so???
Enjoy you weekend darlings!!!

Another wild conversation

2010-10-06T18:58:00.005+05:30

:-) this is a continuation to my earlier post. There was this hilarious dialogue from a manager which I overheard say 10 minutes back... I cannot really tell you what went through my mind when I heard that..

Me n the person sitting next to me just gave each other a blank expression and let the meaning of the line, just unfold itself into our own corny minds...

Hi Ms Tania, I have make files and loaded that into the table...
Wonder what make the files where...

.. let me do the sharing and unsharing again (:-D)
unsharing and sharing what?? ;-)

and last but not the least.. the highlight of the call..
I just placed all of your info, only descriptions got changed due to hardness to get valid data

well... I won't tell you what I thought after hearing that.. but you are most welcome to share your thoughts on that one last line... enjoy!!!

Sunday Letter

2010-09-26T23:20:00.001+05:30

I told you I was worked up... really worked up.. and tired and I was so mad and angry at the way things were at work and how life's been treating me.. I tried watching that comedy flick to divert my mind..that didn't help either... I didn't sleep the whole of last night.. and you shouted at me for that.. its not my fault... I tried hard.. and I thought maybe I need to relax, as you said maybe am suffering from high BP :-|

So... I shut down the lights, lighted those perfumed candles, dabbed on some aroma oil and lied down.. with my eyes closed.. they say deep breaths help you relax, so I started doing that.. now stop smiling... you're embarrassing me...

So. like I said I lay there relaxed, and then all of a sudden I saw you&me... US!!! I could see all those breathtaking moments that we spent together... how we always laughed so hard at each other and the silly things we did, how our fingers used to entwine over those long silent walks... how you held me close when we watched the beautiful sun go down.... and yes the first ever time you pinched my ears and punished me for saying something I wasn't supposed to say.. and it did hurt.. remember??? my ears was all red.. wait till I get back at you for this... All that and more my love....

All of it... was soo perfect... so good... honey I don't really know if we are in a dream or if I'm living my dream... whatever it is.. its beautiful and I wish it remains like this forever.

I'm content

2010-08-18T15:48:00.001+05:30

Ding Dong rang the door bell.. 8:30 in the morning NOOOOOOOO I don't wake up this early.. Why can't they wait till 9?? just 30 minutes right?? Presuming my roomies would open the door I tried to slip back to my dreams...

Knock knock.. What??? now who's knocking ??? puhleeeese.. can't you let me sleep in peace?? I got out.. grumpling... and opened the door to see a shabily dressed little boy right outisde my room.. Not all of you would be aware of the fact that I have a certain heart desease.. my heart goes light when I see kids.. and that very reason makes my sister to keep her lil angel away from me.. fearing that I'll spoil her already naughty lil lady irreversibly ;-) ... I smiled at him and he smiled in return.. Ah such a cute and happy smile..

This little boy was the plumbers kid, who'd accompanied his Dad to help him when he's at work. As he got busy with his work I noticed the shirt he was wearing.. torn near his armpits, a gaping hole which ended right above his abdomen and then a rope for a belt over his largely sized shorts to keep it from falling down... My heart shrunk and my eyes welled up... and I was talking about buying a new belt just .. just because I thought its been awhile I bought a new one

I wathced him work.. without complaining.. with an enthusiasm I don't see in myself or rather anyone at work... I don't know about others.. but i do complain a lot at work.. I crib about how less am being paid for the work that I do... for a work wherein there is no physical labor, for a work which is done in a warmly lit air conditioned environment.. where you a cup of coffee is just a walk away .. where you don't have to spend a penny to get to work or get back from work... a work that guarantees regular income even in case you fall ill and don't go to work for a day or two.

And there he was and yes his Dad as well.. putting his hands inside drains.. pulling out dirt and strands of hair (that even though is from my hair I wouldn't even think of removing). Not sure what he'll do about feeding his family in case he doesn't get a call relaed to plumbing issues for even one day. I felt so shameful for being the self-centered me.. and angry for the injustice on their lives. After paying the dad for his services I ran and opened the fridge to get a choci for the little one. We parted with a smile on our faces. As I waved goodbye.. I thanked him from the bottom of my heart for making me realize how lucky I was to be born in my family and how forunate I'm to live such a perfect life which was otherwise imperfect in my eyes.

When thoughts ran wild at work

2010-08-11T18:06:00.005+05:30

Now this is quite a corny post and maybe some of you might not approve the contents in here... but then I had to write.. just to keep this special incident intact.. so that I'm constantly reminded of the importance to mute your phone while I'm not speaking.. else I might end up in a similar situation and I might let my colleagues/friends imaginations run wild.. just like how the person am about to talk about... let my imaginations run like a wild.. untamed horse ;-)

So lets call this special someone 'Chaman' cuz thats what we all call him lovingly.. of course in his absence.. To talk about Chaman, he has always been our subject of lunchtime gossip... he is basically a harmless fanatic in our team.. who talks in whispers and we never ever hear a word her says.. Of course we were completely unaware of the fact that he was going onsite.. until and unless it was announced by our dear old manager.. we didn't know he got a silver award until we read the internal mails...

And finally our hero flew to Austria a few days back and in order to communicate and co-ordinate the work with his precious offshore counterparts our dear manager came up with a strategy of having a daily call... So here's the series of events that happened in the call today...

Callers1, 2, 3 : Hi this is A, B, C here...
Chaman : Hi Good morning everybody Chaman here...
All of us reduces our phone volume
Caller 3 : Hi D here...
After increasing our volume we ask him to repeat his name :-D

As we waited.. with bated breath for our manager to join the call.. our dear Mr Chaman implemented the lessons he learnt on the recent Time Management training...
he started with his breathing exercise....
After exchanging puzzled looks with each other we continued with our work... as the time progressed.. his breathings grew deeper.. and faster .... ...

without even wasting a minute I started a group chat with my close friends in the team ;-)
Me : Guys.. what the hell is he doing??

N : I dunno am getting some dirty thoughts..
Me : Exactly .. I guess he's making out :P
H : Chi chi.. wat r u gals talking??
Me : aur nahi tho kya?? listen to the increase in rhythm... ROFL
N : ROFL.. you think anyone out there would make out with him?? of all the people???
Me : Yeah ...
H : Stop it I say... Sai Nathaa.. please cleanse these impure minds....

as we continued to listen and finally the deep breathing ended up in a moan...hmmmm.... curious.. excited.. pings were exchanged amongst the team members.. along with suppressed giggles

We let our own individual imaginations run wild.. Chaman darling started speaking over the phone.. 'Aaj raat ka kya plan hai??? kahin baahar chalen???' At that point a seniors teammate known for his high tolerance level picked up the phone and spoke in 'I request the team to put your phone on mute and un-mute it only when you have been asked to speak' .. damn how I hated him for saying that... I had a juicy topic to talk over lunch.. forget about lunchtime gossip... I was having a lovely time letting the creative juices flow in all possible directions...

Longing

2010-08-03T18:41:00.006+05:30

He sat there and opened the last of the remaining notes she left... "Baby I soo miss our morning cup of coffee together!!!" he smiled.. man she loves me.. she really does love me a lot. That was so cute of her to leave tiny little messages here and there.. but he was sad that this was the last one for now.. he'll have to wait.. wait until he meets her again to get another set of cute lil surprises!! She sure has her way to keep him guessing everytime... and always left him wanting for more.. it made him feel special.. no one ever made him feel the way she did. If only he could tell her how much he loved her and how much he needs her. If only he could rush back now and hold her tight.. to feel her heart beat in rhythm with his... to run his hair through those soft tresses... and sink into those deep brown eyes.. but then he knew he had to wait.. a few more days... days that creeps by like centuries...

She sat there.. slowly sipping her morning cup of coffee..God I miss him soo much!!! She missed him waking her up everyday with his sweet smile.. Oh! how she missed the fun of lazily brewing the morning cup of coffee. And then she thought of the last of the few notes she'd kept hidden.. Wonder if he'd find it... lol he must be searching the entire place for it She loved to hear the excitement in his voice when he always calls her up after discovering each one... each day... her happiness new no bounds when she see him happy. Her world has been revolved around his happiness for quite some time.. she loves it the way it is.. and she doesn't want anyone or anything to change it. God if only she could see him now.. and hold him tight.. and let him play with her hair.. run his fingers down her cheeks and see him stare deep into her eyes.. but yes she knows she had to wait.. a few more days...

Conversations that left me gaping

2010-07-18T23:02:00.001+05:30

Here I've compiled a live conversation feed from my own personal chat history as well as that of a few friends who are split across the globe in various locations and various firms. These are stuffs and people do talk like this in this so called corporate world!!! and mind you am sure its gonna leave you stupefied as well.

Mr    : Hi Sigma
Me   : Hi
A      : I need some urgent help from you
Me   : Okies, what is this about??
A     : I became an error
Me   : Sorry?? (:-$)
A     : I ran so n so program and I was waiting for it to complete and then I became an error.. plz help!!
Me   : Oh Lord Can you please mail me the log file??

me:I've completed the assessment and still it shows as not completed in the site. Could you please work on the same and close this issue??
he: this is the appln awareness training na?
he: wright?
me: yes you are right God save me

When one of the team members were questioned upon a certain data issue on a report... the team lead replies..."we had a keep a close eyes, whether report is pulling any data from these kind of tables"

I never knew you could see with closed eyes.. you must be a godly person I say.

A managers update to his team mate on a certain escalation
"The Shit has crossed the roof"

ouch better rush for your raincoats else the shits gonna fall all over you!!

The same manager responds when informed that the issue was not reproducable
'Is there a comfortable handle around which we can track the defects??'

Here's the most hilarious set of announcements we received from a senior team member
"I will be logging in late as I'm going to the burial grounds"
Another announcement followed once he was back in "I'm back in the graveyard"
Team :-O

One team members informs her manager that she would be on maternity leave on a certain period and the manager replies.
'Can you give me another option??'
I had to actually rush out to the ladies room before I ROFL

Someone from the Support team ping me to clear a doubt
B : again In the technical documents its mantioned as ,,,,,
Me : mantion?? hey, can we have a quick call, I guess that would be more helpful as I'm unable to understand the exact issue..
and when I actually spoke to him I realized he pronounces mention as mansion and hence he typed mantion in the chat window

Postscript in an OoO from an onsite counterpart

P.S. Now I sleep 24 hours and try to recover or die.
I will not be reachable on phone or email or sametime.

Me: what are you working on currently?
SD :  iam checking to last two days mails

nice you sit and play mail-mail and this person is supposed to have around 3 years of experience in the industry

Phew daz it for now..will release another version with more hilarious contents!!!

Saari umr hum

2010-06-18T21:01:00.001+05:30

Saari umr hum office mein mar gaye
Ek pal to ab humein jeene do jeene do

Saari umr hum
office mein mar gaye
Ek pal to ab humein jeene do jeene do

Na na na.Na na na.Na na na.Na na nana na.

Give me a break now
Give me some peace
Give me another chance
I wanna go home once again

Give me a break now
Give me some peace
Give me another chance
I wanna go home once again

Kandhon ko laptop Ke bojh ne jhukaya
Client se jhoot bolna tho khud Manager ne sikhaya
4.5 ya 5 rating laaoge to chhuti, varna kismat futi

Kaam kar kar ke pada Ungaliyon pe
REVIEW, SCREEN aur REWORK ka chaala
Is Project ne to sala poora..
Poora bheja pakka daala

Career to gaya
Boy Friend bhi gaya
Ek pal to ab humein
jeene do jeene do

Saari umr hum
office mein mar gaye
Ek pal to ab humein jeene do jeene do

Give me a break now
Give me some peace
Give me another chance
I wanna go home once again

Give me a break now
Give me some peace
Give me another chance
I wanna go home once again

Na na na.Na na na.Na na na.Na na nana na.

Dedicated to all my software buddies!!! This is not my piece of work, but that of a colleague... Life in a corporate minus the dressings!

Meeting Prince Charming

2010-06-15T18:37:00.003+05:30

A part of a conversation I had with a newly married colleague of mine ;-)

He comes to the floor dreamy eyed, shining bright with a hint of blush in his cheeks. Looks around and checks if anyone’s noticed his presence, in order to cheer him up I said ‘Hey S, welcome back!!’

VS : Hi!! How are you??
Me : going good.. so where are the sweets??
VS : Oh! Sorry blah blah… So when are you giving me the good news of your marriage??
Me : When its time .. he he

By then another friend of mine joined us and the question was diverted to her marriage

VS : So M, when are you giving me the good news??
M : *blush*
I keep a straight face as I whispered; ‘tell him once you get married only then can a good news happen, isn’t it wrong to have a child out of wedlock?? ‘

M : *blush*
VS : I see you are blushing, that means somethings round the corner!!
M : *blushes* gives me the do something look
Me : Well she is actually waiting for her prince charming to come in a white horse and take her away *chuckle*
M : *petrified* I’m gonna kill you for this
VS : Oh ! like in the movies? Nice to hear that so Sig, how is your prince gonna come like??
Me : Ah.. (think my baby think.. we need to keep this going?? )
Me : *smile* Well he will come riding an elephant and take me away *wink*

M gives me the WTF look while VS is thinking had to figure out why I chose an elephant to ride on

VS : Oh yes!! In Kerala elephants are used for auspicious ceremonies they are considered to bring good omen with them right??
Me : Boy!! You got it!! lets keep it going baby and yeah he would be wearing those traditional mundu and vesti
VS : Will he be having a sword in his hands??? LOL and will it be a white elephant??
Me : LOL no white elephants please… and Of course yes, he is my prince charming!! My warrior!! how can he come without his sword of honor when he's come to impress the love of his life??

M shakes her head and rolls her eyes at me.. and gives me that cut the crap lady

Me : And yeah he will have his hairs rolled in a bun like those old princes used to do
VS : *puzzled* ohh ok and maybe you will be wearing those traditional set saree of mallus right??
Me : Obviously and I would have my hair pleated.. but wait a minute my hair isn’t that long! God I should start growing my hair long enough that I can pleat it.. God please don’t send him until then…
VS and M : :O
Me : You see I want the picture to be perfect.. it would look incomplete.. but how do I get on top of the elephant so he can take me away??

VS and M : *vanishes*

Poor souls was too busy to even say that they were leaving.. well its their loss… not mine :P

Waking up

2010-06-10T16:55:00.007+05:30

She opened her eyes and looked down.. he was there.. as always lying on her stomach... sleeping like a child.. but she was the child amongst the two and it was he who bought out the child in her.

She ran her fingers through his hair and smiled to herself as she watched his head rising up and down in rhythm with her breathing. Slowly she moved his head down from her stomach so she could get up.. he slowly moved up and hugged her tight, fluttered his lashes and lovingly looked at her through the windows of his soul. They laid there for sometime... lost in each other.. as always.. and then they kissed each other and rose with the rising sun.

A bunch of nosy loosers

2010-06-01T17:04:00.008+05:30

Ever been in a situation where the most unconcerned set of people seem to be really concerned about the whereabouts of you and why you did not get through the entrance examinations or why you didn't get placed in a so n so company and why you aren't married and if married why you haven't had kids in 3 months??? and if you have kids then... I guess why you haven't bought a house for yourself?? and then why you couldn’t get admissions in so-n-so school... and then why your kids didn't get through the entrance examinations and its a never ending list and always forms a vicious circle.

Being single at the age where my friends are giving birth to kids has been the woes of my relatives and not so close friends of mine. Given below are the excerpts from a few ~~maddening~~ entertaining conversation with the best of my list of well wishers!!!

Ms A was someone who once cribbed about how she used to get irritated at the way people keep questioning her marital status. How insensible people can get and how they can't mind their own business :-)

Ms A : Hey, long time no see wazzup with ya?
Me    : Hi, yeah hows you?? (when have we been such great friends for u to miss me soo much??)
Ms A: Am doing fine, doing great!! getting married soon
Me   : Oh great man!! congratulations!!! who's the guy and when the D day??
Ms A : (After feeding me on the minutest details of her forthcoming fortune she finally asks )
          So are you still planning to climb up your career graph and stay single?? Why don't you get married girl??
Me    : Well.... who says am not married yet?? am already married to my profession ;-)
Ms A : Nice, hey I gtg now, need todo my wedding shopping!!!
Me : Bye (get lost you hypocrite)

Uncle V paid a visit to my home when I was on vacation. One of the top listers in my black book of bad people, I hated him to the core. But Mamma dear doesn't approve of me from pouring out my inexorable  love on him. Now that he was a guest and since my family is known for our hospitality I made him a cup of tea, and went ahead to serve him with a few assortments.

Uncle V : God bless you my child, everybody should have a daughter like you
Me        : :) (Shut up you liar bum)
Uncle V : I will find a nice groom for you, girls like you only deserves the BEST
Me        : flashes a shy smile (of course I deserve only the BEST)

A few hours post the incident I was phoned and informed by a cousin that Uncle V was visiting his house and he mentioned something like ... Meety's having a boyfriend in Hyderabad, and thats the reason why she isn't married yet. Her mother should have seen it coming know?? sending single daughters out of state to earn money.. let her suffer for her doings.. Hmmph had Amma let me do what I wanted to do when I saw him in the morning!!

Then there was this lovely friend of mine who was soo soo concerned for me... Here the link to a post by my friend, this was based on that last conversation that I had with that special friend.

And last but not the least.. a relative??? of mine who seem to have promised himself to shoot me off with questions based on my marriage...

SP : Hi
Me : Hi
SP : I'm so n so person who is so n so's cousin... I don't remember meeting you but saw all my cousins in our mutual friends list
Me : Yeah I checked with one of my cousins before adding you
SP : So, are you married???
Me : not yet... am not in a hurry at all :)

2 Weeks later

SP : Hi
Me : Hi
after all the formal exchange of queries related to health wealth and happiness
SP : I've been going through your pictures, you seem to be gaining more n more with every recent pic
Me : Yeah unable to keep a check on my food intake
SP : You have a boyfriend??
Me : No, Y?
SP : Well in that case you better keep a check on your weight... if you keep gaining at this rate then it'll be hard for you to get married
Me : Oh Thank you soo much for your concern, but don't expect me to get into size zero for a prospective groom when I don't really know if he wants me round, seize zero or obese.

After a weeks time

SP : Hey, hello
Me : Hi (grrrrrrrrrr)
SP : So late?? whats cooking??
Me : nm (now that u pinged me its my brain thats cooking)
SP : Chatting with your boyfriend???
Me : 'Boys' who are 'friends' (haven't you asked about my boyfriend before??)
SP : So marriage vallathum??
Me : No (#$%^& hey wait a minute I can't keep letting him talk to me like this... let me get the better of him)
Me : Can I ask you something??
SP : Shoot
Me : Did anybody from our family tell u that in case I don get married in nother 1 months time, then u'll have to marry me??
SP : what?? I don't understand
Me : I repeat :) Did anybody from our family tell u that in case I don get married in nother 1 months time, then u'll have to marry me??
SP : No y??
Me : Well I couldn't think of any other reason for ur curiosity around my marriage
SP : ha ha ha
Me : hee hee hee

It might've been a little rude, but that will keep me away from his irritating thesis related to my marriage.

For once... why don't people mind their own business?????

Scarred

2010-05-25T17:56:00.001+05:30

She winced as she stared back at the wound.. still bleeding . It might leave a scar a very ugly scar!! Oh! how will you live with it my dear??
She smiled back, I do not really know but I know I have to live with it, I only hope it fades with time

She's always loved her smile, there was something calm and soothing about it. It was like a blissful showers on those cruel summer days. How could she smile like that with something so painfully grotesque?? If only she could do something to help her. She'd always been there when she needed her. with that sunshine of a smile which always gave her all the strength that she needs. through all time.... celebrated her triumphs with her, brooded all her worries with her, buried all her secrets in her, and even when she ignored her, always stood there waiting for her.

If only I could do something, I've never ever done anything for her. I've always been selfish and jealous of her, her smile, her serenity, her loyalty. I always felt distraught that she was what I've always wanted to be and never ever could be. Will you be able to hide it from others?? I just hope it fades with time

She smiled her invincible smile : If I could hide it from you all this while then why not others?? You were with me all the while and you never knew until I showed you... I was within you, a part of you and you never knew.. Why don't you understand my dear that you are me and I'm you???

She stared back at the scar... and now she felt the pain... so rightfully hers... If only she had felt it earlier she could have stopped it from growing so deep gnawing onto her thinning soul...She had been busy chasing on those wordly pleasures .. not even once did she think about her And then She knew... that the pain would finally race away and the scar would finally fade away... now that she finally knows...

She made my day

2010-05-19T14:56:00.002+05:30

All through these years I've know a lot of people who waste their entire life chasing happiness and setting goals which would make them happy. Is happiness something which can be defined or do you think it can be achieved when a certain someone comes to your life or a certain something happens in your life?? There were times when people asked me What makes you happy?? well actually I don't really have an definite answer for that.. my happiness do not have a predefined set of rules.. I'm someone who finds joy in the minutest of things.. sometimes something happen and I feel happy... it might come across as a silly things to others.. but being so I have had my fair share to feel happy every now and then :)

Enough of boring philosophies and lets get to the point. Aadi if you are reading this.. today I missed my cab and something nice and sweet happened :) . As you said something's really got to do with me missing my cabs. Hey lemme just fast forward the set of events and make it short and sweet just like the experience. I walked past the security gate and went through the usual security checks and headed for my building. The security lady came running behind and stopped me. Then she was like 'Madam can you get me any old handbag of yours if you can??' I didn't even think twice before I said 'Sure, but why old?? why not new??' It is impossible for me to put down into words what exactly I felt that moment.

Our interactions were always restricted to a smile and a usual Good Afternoon wish which is at times followed by a 'Had your lunch??' question. We don't even know each others names.. even now.. I felt so good that inspite of the lack of a deep friendship, she did feel close enough to ask me a favor. I felt like somwhere deep down she considered me as a friend and I always feel good when I make friends!!
So this weekend I will shop for a nice bag for the lady and maybe I might write another post on how good I felt when I gave her that bag and yeah now that we are friends... it is a shame not to know each others name so I will definitely close that loop as well :)

So bye for now and have a great day guys!!

Office Stationery to the rescue

2010-05-12T15:03:00.001+05:30

It was just another lousy weekday morning. To add on to the misery, I missed my cab as well. After bargaining enough with the money minting Rickshaw wala's I finally got myself a good deal and jumped into the rick before I ended up melting in the hyderabadi heat.

As I reached my office I was excited to see a friend at the gate. 'Hi!!!' I said and jumped out in a hurry... 'Hi!!' she said followed by a RRRRIIIIP sound and there goes my slit up 2 inches above the required level. The rickshaw wala looked up and said 'tumhaara kurta phata hai' (as if I didn't know). With an embarassing grin I looked back at my friend who was gaping at my new stylish avatar. With a meeting in another 15 minutes I knew i didn't have the time to go back and change and come. Moreover the kind of people I get to deal with I was sure even a near death accident narration would stop them from pointing fingers at me for missing such a ~~worthless~~ important meeting.

I covered the extra lenght of the slit with my handbag and rushed up to the floor probing my already disturbed mind as to how to cover my modesty. An idea struck me and as they say an Idea can change lives; well this idea save my day if not change my life :) Back in the ladies room I sent my draw keyes to my friend through a colleague and asked me friend to get the rusting peice of stationary for me. She bought it, the hardly 100 bucks peice seemed a millions dollars worth to me at that moment. I took the precious peice of metal and plastic in my arms and started working on the fixes that I intended to do, though I wasn't sure if the end product would be what I had desired.....

I fipped my kurta over and and stapled my way up the loose stitches and created like a perfect line of stitches running through the garment with the perfect finish that would put even Ritu Kumar to shame. Viola!!! in another 5 minutes time I was standing there right in front of the mirror staring back at the cute girl in her cute kurta, slits in place with a perfect fit. With a smile and 7 minutes in hand, I hurried over my touch ups and rushed to the meeting room right on time.

So people, though office stationeries are the least used items in the current era of "soft copies", I would ask you to keep these aside so that you can put them to better use in such crunch situations.

I Wish

2010-05-07T19:15:00.002+05:30

I wish I could hold your hands and feel the need to be yours.

I wish I could sink into those oh so deep eyes of yours
I wish I could spend the entire day just listening to the soulful voice of yours

I wish I could go to the beach tonight with you
Lie down on the sand and stargaze with you
I wish I could stay the whole night awake with you
Fly up to the moon and watch the earth with you

I wish you could hear all that I want to say
I wish this distance between us would disappear some day
I wish you would come along n whisper that forever with me you will stay

Mistaken Orientation

2010-05-06T14:31:00.001+05:30

Well well.. what would you think if you get to witness a head on collision of two individuals who are in a hurry to catch their cabs??? What if it were two girls?? I presume you would feel sorry for the two and check if any were hurt.. thats what I would've done.. But the onlookers at the said arena let their imaginations run wild... Thanks to the grapevine I got to hear a few think we were going around My so called innocent friendship, daily morning hugs with this like minded friend has fuelled the already corrupted minds of the sad people around me!! ROFL ... I so much pity those bigoted species who are supposedly working in a corporate world where such notions are best left upon the shelf!!

How could they talk like that about someone who finds John Abraham extremely hot?? about someone who went mad at the sight of Will Smith's butt in Hancock?? How can they talk like that about someone who finds Surya extremely irresistible and goes weak in the heart each time he looks at his object of love with those roving eyes?? Someone who's the first to notice and inform her friends about 'the new cute guy in the floor' oops!! did I say too much??? Isn't that enough to prove that I'm as straight as an arrow??

As for all you clodhopping gossip mongers, say whatever you feel to your hearts content cause it makes me feel am famous.. after all gossips are always made on the famous... I'm thrilled to know am the new celebrity :)

All at once

2010-04-30T20:24:00.014+05:30

'Hey Sheena, what a pleasant surprise!!' said Ronak. Although its been about 2 years since he deleted her number from his phone, it lay there imprinted in his mind, like the stone carvings on the walls of the temple he so loved to visit every often.

Sheena : Hi, how are you?
Ronak : Moving on.. how about you?
Sheena : Am doing good.. enjoying life..
Ronak : Good for you... so what made you call me after such a long time???
Sheena : Well.. Nikhil wanted to talk to you and since you've forbidden me from passing your number to anyone I decided to conference, you can hang up once you guys are done.. I'll just conference and keep the phone aside
Ronak : Oh ok.. Take care..
Sheena: Ok.. you too..

And she left, leaving him with Nikhil...
'Bye Nikihl, do drop in when you get time' he was in no mood to talk..

A strange feeling groped through his stomach and rose up to his chest .. 'NO!
NO NO NO NO WAY!! it took me almost 2 years to gather myself, I won't let a phone call ruin it all for me' he shouted and sat down. He ran his hands through his shaved head.. he was dizzy.. I need some rest.. maybe I'll sleep for some time.. he walked to his room and lied on his bed.. staring up the ceiling.. how I wish she'd come back.

Just then the phone rang, 'You didn't even ask me to come back you moron! You are always like this.. its always me.. am the one who always patches up.. I'm the one to say sorry always.. I thought you would've changed.. but look at you! You are still the same.. the cute little rascal that I've always loved' Tears rolled down his cheeks.. he couldn't believe she finally said what he wanted her to say since 2 years.. 'Baby am soo soo sorry.. I just thought you've moved on.. and didn't want to upset you. You know I need you don't you?? you know I can never say that to you..' 'Moved on?? I'm coming.. am coming over NOW and will slap you hard to let you know how well I've moved on'

He pinched himself to be sure it wasn't a dream. Man it wasn't, he ran down the stairs and rushed to the stores to get her favorite drink and the chicken to go with. I'll make it a special for her... to let her know how much I missed her... All at once he was staring back at the ceiling, he realized it was all a dream or was it just his imaginations running wild?? Whatever it was... it was nothing but real

The Story of Molty and Monty

2010-04-21T15:18:00.009+05:30

All characters appearing in this work are existing. Any resemblance to real persons is purely intentional.

Once upon a time there was a very naughty but brilliant boy who never lived his life the way his parents wanted… he did not do anything that made his parents happy… then all of a sudden came a cool breeze in the form of his life partner and changed the way this boy lived… The life partner was the epitome of what love is.. what caring is… his life simply jumped into a different lane which was filled with love and respect and he started achieving his ambitions.. his dreams.. one by one.. He and his love lived happily ever after for many years… They shared their old age together and they became the envy of every couple in the word… The boy is Monty and his life partner is Molty.. This is the story of their life and their love

The lonely star

2010-04-06T23:03:00.008+05:30

I was waiting for a rick to go home last night along with a friend. One of the rickshaws which was going in the opposite direction stopped and the driver asked me "Ekkada??" (where??)

As I opened my mouth to reply I noticed that there was just one star in the deep blue sky above me. I turned my head to look at the lonely star. "Why are you so lonely tonight? Did you fight with the love of your life? are you single like me? don't you have any friends?? or did they choose to stay back with their respective lovers and left you on your own today or did you decide to let them spend time together and be a loner??Is something bothering you?? do you also prefer to be on your own when you are upset?? hello.... you hear me??"

He chose not to answer and just winked a twinkle at me :)

By that time my friend had found a rick and managed to bargain for a reasonable fare... "Take care and Good night" I said to the lonely star as I jumped into the rick.

Back in the rick, my friend was all smiles and kept giggling though I wasn't cracking a joke :P. On enquiry she narrated an incident which happened right in front of me, but I failed to notice as I was too busy with the star

Rewind a little... "As I opened my mouth to reply I just noticed that there was just one star in the deep blue sky above me" well.. the rickshaw wala traced my gaze up to the star assuming I was pointing out to the location where I need to go.. he he.. The poor thing was soo frightened that he gave me one puzzled look and fled from the scene as my friend ran behind him.... but he was too horrified to stop ;-)

A friend for all seasons

2010-03-30T19:23:00.009+05:30

Beep beep went her mobile and she stirred in her bed... her lazy hands were searching for her phone.. her half open eyes strained to read the message she just received..

It read
"I know your lazy hands are trying to pick d cell and ur half open eyes are trying to read the message.. Good Morning My Sweet lazy friend getup and please make sure you have your breakfast !"

She smiled.. who else knew her more than him.. her friend for all seasons.. He has always been there, be it the joyful summers, the rejuvenative springs, the melancholic autumn or the lonely winters.
As she woke up and looked at the rising sun she teased him "Don't you envy me for being blessed with such a wonderful friend??"

Quite a weighty issue

2010-03-19T15:57:00.007+05:30

I will be going home in another 3 weeks time. As usual am worried about the extra baggage of fat that I've been carrying around myself which has done nothing but grow over the past few years. Its not that I'm obese or something but over the past few years I have drastically moved from an athletic built to a round couch potato.

So today we had a round table conference on the new upcoming project.
Project Weight loss
Client in question: myself and Gaj(another round friend) :-)
As I put forth my list of business requirements, the Business analysts were ramming their brains to come up with a solution plan.

A : You know I noticed that you laugh a lot, I think that can be one of the reasons why you gained so much. I know quite a lot of people who laugh a lot and they are all very fat.. . maybe daz one of the reasons...Try not to laugh for a few days... Am sure you will lose a lot
Me : Quite a tough thing to do, forget about few days I can't even think about not laughing for the next few minutes :-) (ROFL)
B : Drink a lot of water.. that should do the tricks...
Me : I'm already on that
C : (The most hilarious suggestions of all) I have noticed.. that people who have a lot of jealousy in them.. grow really thin.. The jealousy within will start eating on you.. and gradually you keep losing and you start looking ill
Me : Oh!! in that case I need to start getting jealous... quite a simple solution. I just need to stop feeling jealous when I slim down to a desirable level... ;-)

On our way back to our seat me n Gaj was busy discussing on how to get our project into action.. At any cost we need to meet the deadline of 3 weeks time. We need to find a target to concentrate our jealousy on. We ruled out all our friends from the list, as we were worried if jealousy might leave some drushti on our sweet and caring friends.

Here is a portion of a conversation we had after we got back to our seats :-)

Gaj: heroine I got jealous

Gaj: I went to nishi and I got jealous and came back

Gaj: U know Nishi and her husband both are under Viru sir he is their coach

Me: oh cool

Me: but he is not that great a coach

Me: so u need not be J

Gaj: now nishi's husband will get jealous as he is not good like her and Viru sir will give more importance to her than him

Me: rofl

Me: right

Me: and he will lose all the wt

Gaj: so now we should be jealous of him

Me: rofl, bwn even I just got J when Ramz said she'd be joining swimming classes

Gaj: Oh

Me : Yeah you know what? its really working, I'm burning with jealousy and the heat is burning the extra calories.. am sweating already !! I sure am growing thin ROFL

Gaj : too much!! lol

Jokes apart, I'm in a serious mission to burn a few calories before I run into my Mamma's arms as I know when I hug her, she's sure to feel and measure the thickness of the amount of fat that has deposited around me since my previous visit!

Mute listener

2010-03-16T13:43:00.003+05:30

She picked up the phone but didn't utter a word. After 1 minute which seemed almost like an hour for me I tried to break the silence

Me : Hello, were you sleeping?

S : No... I was just... I could hear silent sobs at the other end. I knew it, that man has hurt her again, as always

Me : What is it this time?

S : I don't really know, I asked him something, I didn't shout. I asked him so politely and he burst out on me

Me : ... ...

S : I have a sincere advice to you, please please pray to God and see to it that you get married to someone who understands you and someone whom you understand. This is all that matters in a relationship. I swear, no money, no job matters as much . My guy has all the money in the world and he has the best job I can boast on, but when it comes to my relationship its a BIG failure.

Me : hmm..

S : Just a little bit of love, daz all I ask for. I don't want him to shower me with money, I don't mind if we live in a small house.. as long as he understands me, as long as he loves me.

Me : He loves you, I can vouch on that

S : What is the use? He has never ever made me feel so... if not always once in a while can't he show a lil bit of love? I feel am nothing but a maid in this BIG house, someone to do the dishes, someone to cook, wash clothes..

Me : Thats not true and you know that.. just try talking to him and let him know that this is what matters

S : As though he would understand

Me : There's no harm in trying..

S : .Daz right.. Will talk to him tom, let me try and catch some sleep now..bye, take care dear, and remember, its the person that matters the most in marriage than money or status

Me : I know bye.. Plz take care will call u tom

A tiny droplet of tear trickled down my cheeks and fell on the bed, I watched it as it slowly spread over the sheet and finally disappeared. How I wish her problems would vanish like that She is one of the sweetest ladies I've met in my life. Though we are generations apart, we share a special bond with each other. A special understanding for each other, a special friendship that I always treasure.

Life is so unfair. All that she wanted from her man was a little bit of love, but he showered her with everything but love. She has spent her entire life giving love to everyone around her without expecting anything in return. For the first time, when she sets her expectations, why is it that it is not met ??? Why is it that its always the good people who has to be at the receiving end? ? I'm so so disappointed when I see genuinely good people go through such agonies in life :(

I wish I could do something... but all I did was be a mute listener as that was what she always wanted me to be.

Arm chair

2010-03-15T18:02:00.003+05:30

Just another day in office. Due to some port issues a colleague was asked to sit in another location. Since madam was sitting quite far off, we decided to walk over and fill her up on all the nasty things she's been missing that day.

As we were puking out the entire mess ups to her I stretched my arms for an empty chair which I'd seen on my way. I tried to pull but it wouldn't move. I held the arm of the chair and tried pulling harder while laughing at a joke. The chair didn't even move a bit. As I put a firm grip on the chair I noticed it was exceptionally soft. Ooh nice chair! Wish I had one of these at my desk as well. I turned back to see if it looked as nice as it felt.

To my horror I saw that what I thought to be a chairs arm was in fact a guy’s arm which was resting over the chairs arm. Yikes! I was petrified. I just hoped and prayed that mother earth would open up right there and swallow me exactly like how she swallowed Sita devi. Without having the courage to even apologize I tiptoed out of the bay and back to my seat praying that I never ever end up in front of that guy for the rest of my life.

Of course later I was double up with laughter as I narrated the "Oh such a nice chair" episode to my friends. Lessons learnt?? well... not any .. any suggestions??

I shall grow my brows ;-)

2010-03-09T18:08:00.003+05:30

For the past few months I have been teased and linked with a Mr X at my work place.
During the initial days although we used to tease Ms Y with Mr X, for her keen observation, come on, how can you notice someone's been looking at just one person, without you observing him so close?? She finally chose another person for herself and left me with Mr X. I was neither happy nor sad with that but I must admit all of us had been having quite a lot of fun over it.

So finally after these many days of fun, we just came to know that our lucky Mr X, will not be seen in the floor for another few months as he was going away for awhile.

The drama queen in me jumped into action "I'm gonna miss him sooo much " (Followed with a very sad expression in my face ;-)) They were pretty shocked at it.. one of them the most innocent in the lot panicked. "We were just teasing; you aren't taking it seriously are you?" I said with a more serious tone in my voice "It must be a joke for you but not for me.. the other day I happened to look into his eyes and I had butterflies in my heart " Having said that I had to rush out from the place and find a safe place where I could laugh out. Good lord I couldn't believe I could deliver such oh so romantic lines.. lol

As I continued to torture the people around me, one of my witty friends quipped, "If you were a guy you could've grown a stubble to get the Devdas look" to which I replied "Not a problem babes, You see, While guys look shabby when they don't shave, girls look the same when they don't thread, so I might as well grow my eye brows and not thread my brows until my hero(lol) is back to let him know how heart broken I were in his absence.. " sniff sniff

FYI: I'm planning to get my eye brows done this friday while my beloved will be busy settling down in the new place.. Ah! how I miss you dahlin!! ;-)

Happy Women's Day

2010-03-08T22:42:00.008+05:30

On this special occasion on women's day I would like to write a few words on all the wonderful and outstanding women in my life in the order in which they stepped into my life

P.S. : A looooong post ahead....

God could not be everywhere and therefore he created mothers.
Believe it or not but the above Jewish proverb holds true in my life. My mother, the most beautiful woman in my life is no less than God to me. I've always been anything but proud to have her in my life. Mom you really don't know how much I adore you and the things you do for me without expecting anything in return. Mom, all my life I've been trying to be like you, and I know how hard it is to be so patient, so forgiving and so full of love. Today on women's day I ask for nothing but your happiness and you know I'm striving hard for it. Mom I love you so much and I owe you my entire life and I will lay my life for you if I have to.

An older sister is a friend and defender - a listener, conspirator, a counsellor and a sharer of delights. And sorrows too.
Oh yes my sister is all of this and more. Someone who always found me pretty even when I'm just back from my sports practice tanned and dirty.Someone who's kept her happiness beyond mine. How many a times had she sacrificed the best dress, or the best piece of chicken ;-) just to see me happy. Someone who decides to go shopping for herself and ends up buying stuffs for her sisters and forgets to get one for herself. Someone who's my worst critic.. lol how I hate it when she tell me I look fat in that top when others would have passed a nod :-) Though I agree I feel disappointed, I know I can trust you to choose only the best for me. So today Echi, I want you to fill your heart with joy and look out to the world and see yourself wrappedin a blanket of happiness, cuz if you see it in your eyes, I'm sure you can hold it in your hands.

Bless you, my darling, and remember you are always in the heart - oh tucked so close there is no chance of escape - of your sister.

Yes baby mine, thats all I got to tell you on Women's day. Though your entry into my life was filled with jealousy and insecurities, the bubbly little baby with beautiful smile and lovely eyes just drained the insecurities out of my heart. I learned to share with all my heart. If not for you I wouldn't have known how much Echi felt for me, cuz I know it is just like what I feel for you. So now I wish my little girl good luck in your studies and grow up to be a wonderful and respectful woman.

If you have one true friend, you have more than your share.

Oh yes Shalini, I'm pretty sure you expected me to mention you in this post darling!! How can I talk about the most important women in my life and not mention you?? I would like to make this short, as I'm planning for a future post which would be all yours, so baby I just want you to know that I need no other friend in my life as long as you stick to me as always. We've been together for more than a decade and neither distance, not time has done any damage to the amazing comfort zone that we share with each other and I know its going to be the same forever. Love ya loads muuuuuuuah

You’re more like a sister than a sister-in-law, we’re as close as two friends can be. I want you to know, this comes from the heart, how much you mean to me.
No words can explain what this pretty lady bought to our lives. She is the thread that joins the entire family. The patient soul who always takes pain and gives love in return. One lady who made me realize how important it is to express your love for your loved one's. Someone who jumps with excitement just at the sight of an sms or a call from me. Someone who's always amused me and keeps me wondering if am I worth all the love she has for me.. So jambloozie Edthu pie!! on women's day I wish you good health and the strength to overcome all the hurdles in life. oink oink ;-)

No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth..
Sajini Mathew: My mentor in the new organization. We started off with a mentor-mentee relationship and I never expected it to end up in such deep a friendship. One person who actually shouts at me on top of her voice.. lol "Sigma! What have you done to yourself???" even it is something like that I never feel bad or sad or angry when she shouts .. lol Be it a bad haircut, a clumsy piece of code or a nice shirt, I know I look my best when she tells me you're looking good. I know I'm looking awful when she tells me .. Genie, I just want you to stay the same bubbly self and keep smiling!!! Cuz I just LOVE your smile :-)

A friend loves at all times:
She's one woman who has been with me no matter what. I know I've hurt you quite a lot. Though I was not always there for you, I know you are there when I need you no matter what time it is. On women's day I apologize for being the దయ్యం (:-) see I wrote in telugu for you )I was.. I apologize for each time I hurt you and promise you I'll try my best to be the best for you :-) Even though I get angry at times, really really love you with all my heart Ugri.. Thanks for being what you are to me.

Last but not the least...

A true friend is someone who knows there's something wrong even when you have the biggest smile on your face. Bloody hell Dipinni I alwaya hated it when you ask me whats wrong when am laughing loud at someone joke's while I was crying within. I know you adore me a lot and I still haven't figured out why. But I must confess I feel so good when you keep telling me how much you love me. I'm not the kind who's so frequent at expressing my love, but I guess by now you already know I do really love and respect you a lot. On women's day I request you to focus all your attentions on the good things in life and not to feel low ever.. cuz though I don't tell you always, it hurts to see you hurt >>:D<<

Well I sure hope for the list to grow bigger and bigger with more and more wonderful people who would join me in this wonderful journey called Life!!!

आ बैल मुझे मार

2010-03-05T18:16:00.003+05:30

Another boring day in office. Post the so called go-live, we were finally happy that we were very much alive after months and months of working over weekends and slogging our ass's out for 16-18 hours. This is the so-called "Honeymoon Period" for all implementation projects where in you just need to be in office with no work to do at all.

Scene 1: 1PM IST, Cyber Gateways:
For people like us who are used to working nonstop this was something really hard to take. Sitting idle for hours with no work at all was driving us insane. One such insane colleagues of mine decided to vent out his frustration on me. He came over to my desk and though he saw I was busy reading my frirends blog, he kept pestering me for a considerable amount of time until I lost my cool. I lifted my fists, playfully and said "If you don't disappear from here in another 5 minutes, I will punch you"

At this the hero was "Aha! you think I'll get scared?? beat me, beat my now" and he took my fists and hit my knuckles hard on his forehead and left without saying a word. I didn't really know how to react, my knuckles hurt a lot and I really wanted to punch him hard but chose not to as I knew it would rather aggravate the pain.

Scene 2: 5PM IST, Cyber Gateways:
The hero comes back and sat on my desk and started off

S   : Your fingers hurt don't they??
Me : Yah a bit, but not that bad either, its bearable
S   : वो क्या है न (He shrugs and gives me a sheepish smile)
Me : Sorry बोलने आए हो ? (With a victorious smile)
S   : Sorry?? चल हठ तुझे पता है क्या हुआ ?
Me : Not until you tell me boss am not that good at guessing game

Slowly he shifted a portion of his silky hair away from his forehead, to reveal a small lump over his forehead, exactly where he had hit earlier.

I burst into a fit of laughter as he glared at me. The phrase "आ बैल मुझे मार" kept echoing in my mind as I laughed for another 5-10 minutes. The poor thing should have thought twice before messing up with me . Of all the people he chose Me the steel woman??

As I said earlier my work queue is empty, so thought I'll try and write a post on this. Just to pass my time :)

I forgot something

2010-03-03T16:04:00.002+05:30

We've heard quite a few stories about people forgetting things. Some their home keys, others mobile, wallet and the list goes on. If you notice closely you would know that people usually tend to lose/forget things which are considerably tiny.

Well until yesterday I was under the notion that people tend to forget things that are usually small in size. Maybe they are too small for us to sense the absence of the same. All such delusions of mine were put to an end yesterday. As I sat in my cab, watching the people outside, smirking at those friends of mine whose cabs was yet to come. Suddenly I got a strange feeling in my mind that I forgot something. Something.. but what???

I tried hard to recollect, I checked for my mobile, it was there in my hands, I checked for my mp3 player, it was there in my laptop bag, where I searched for my wallet and the house keys as well. Everything seems to be in place, then what is it that I’m missing??

My handbag, it was really hard for me to grasp the fact that I had forgotten my bag.. but where?? The realization was too hard for me to take. I was filled with a mixture of emotions; When one part of my mind wanted to laugh of loud at the thoughts of forgetting something soo BIG, the other side was filled with panic, what if I left it somewhere and will not get it back again?? The heights of it all were that my memories failed to gather as to where I'd left my bag.

I called up one of my friends and asked her to check the washrooms. She called back only to make me feel worse, apparently she checked everywhere she could, but in vain. I tried hard and forced myself to remember, but no use. The stubborn brain of mine decided not to co-operate. After a lot of pleading and a promise for a hot oil head massage the coming weekend, it revealed the fact that I had left my bag at a colleague’s desk. I called up my friend and asked her to check at his desk and ah yes she said, there it was right in front of her. She ran down and gave me my precious one, right when the cabs started moving out of the premises.

I thanked God and myself of course, had I not had that ‘I forgot something’ feeling….. So now if you guys ask me what plans for the weekend, I can definitely tell you I'll be paying a visit to Lee's to get myself a hot oil head massage ;-P

Moral of the story : “The increase in probability of forgetting something is not always inversely proportional to the size of the object; there are exceptions which needs to be handled as well”

2012 Dooms days - Who will save us??

2010-02-25T18:36:00.002+05:30

Ever since the release of the movie 2012, quite a few mails have been flooding our mailbox on various theories that would narrow down on one point - 2012 all life on earth would come to an end!!

When one such mail was forwarded to the offshore team by one of the my teammates, we decided to sit and talk over it.

The single and but not ready to mingle Bal Brahmachari of the team was taken aback by the prediction. 'No way.. thats just 3 years from now :-( You know what? Am planning to get married in another 6 months. That way I will be married... would have known how it feels to get married and will not have to live long enough to bear with the tantrums of my so called wife'

The married lady in the team decided to postpone your family plans until 2012- Incase we survive.. then I will have babies post 2012 -- Not a bad idea

The doting daughter said "I'm really happy about that! Atleast I needn't leave my parents along back here. We will all die together, if not who will take care of them when am gone??"

But.. the heights of it all was our very own saviour who stunned us all with his opinion on the so called 2012 dooms day

"Its all crap! As long as Brahmins are alive on earth nothings going to detruct our world. So chill guys"

We were too stunned to react. At this age where science is ruling the world, when you are an educated man, you are sticking onto these age old superstitions?? I couldn't control my laughter so I rushed out, laughed to my hearts content and got back to my seat. I'm sure most of my teammates would have gone through the same thing.

On a serious note, I pity such primitive minds who still delve on the supertitious therories which were nothing but a bunch of lies which were used as weapons against the so-called Ignorant people in the society for the attainment of power and position.

So all you people out there.. now you know "who" should be besides you for you to survive the 2012 disaster.. don't you??

Angels do exist!

2010-02-24T17:11:00.002+05:30

This one's dedicated to 2 little darlings I met. This incident happened a few days back. In order to calm my brooding mind I set our for a walk all by myself. The long and lonely walk did nothing but dampen my already dimishing spirits and so I decided to walk back home.. maybe a lil bit of browsing might help.

I decided to turn around and walk back... 15 minutes later as I passed by 2 little girls. They called out to me "Akka.. Akka.." Looking at their shabby clothes I thought they must be one of those roadside kids who pester you for money. Thinking about the bad experiece I had with one of those kids I decided to walk fast and not stop. I could hear them running behind me and calling out for me.. as they drew loser I started digging my bag for change. Just as they reached me the 2 of them said with a happy smile "Hi Akka". Now that was something that I didn't expect. I smiled back and said "Hi!!" .

As the kids slowed down and started walking alongside me I felt a sudden tide of relief swept through my mind, clearing all sad thoughts within me. All of a sudden I started feeling happy, feeling good... as though the sadness in me was just sucked out .. I felt as though they were my guardian angels :)

Li’l Angels : “Meeru ekkadakki velthunaru akka??” (where are you heading to)
Me : Shilpa park nana (Shilpa park baby)

They told me they were heading for somewhere close by to my place and they were happy that we’re going to walk together for some more time. Then they started talking.. they spoke about school, dance, fun, PT, holidays…. Like a new found friend from school even I was totally enjoying the conversation as I told them how even I used to hate homework’s and how good I feel about those one day off’s we get in between school owing to bandh/hartal (these days I guess Kerala students get more of those holidays than what we ever had).

As we went on a on about things little did we realize we’re reached that turning point of this beautiful journey where we had to part ways. The older of the two pointed towards a cute little house and said “Ade ma illu” Daz our home. They younger one was in no mood to stop her non-stop chattering. We stood there and spoke for a few more minutes until the older one reminded the little angel that she shouldn’t forget that they’d gone to the market to get rice. Their Mom must be waiting for them to start cooking.

At that note she looked at me smiled and said I need to go now. I smiled and said yes I know. Since I had the habit of carrying chocolates in my bag, I took out 2 and gave it to those kids. The kids were overjoyed. Little did they know that this was nothing compared to the joy they gave me in the lonely road that I walked carrying the heavy burden of sorrow in my mind. I was just looking for a little bit of happiness and they gave me a shower that drenched me in happiness.

I do not know their names, neither do they know mine. Yet they managed to carve a special place in my heart. Each time I think of them I feel good about myself. Somehow they managed to make me feel special at a time when I was feeling completely low, lost in life. I haven’t met them after that day, but am looking forward to see more of the lilttle angels. God bless them!!

A bad start ..a bad end

2010-02-05T00:33:00.002+05:30

Alarm… snooze.. alarm.. snooze… alarm… it must have gone for more than an hour cuz my alarm finally ceased to ring. Then I woke with a start and looked at the time. ‘Oh shit! Am already late’ I had to rush with the very little amount of time I had in hand L .

While getting ready to office I could hear my phone ring.. I rushed to pick it in case its my Mom.. she always gets tensed if I don’t pick up in 3 rings… J Damn.. it was my lead calling for me… with the beginning of the day already foiled .. I was in no mood to make him the first person I talk to. I slowly silenced my mobile and went back to getting ready.

I rushed for the ricks and finally got one.. I was glad I didn’t have to wait for long. Little did I know about the delay this man was about to cause.. as I got down at CT and handed over the money.. ‘Madam change nahin hai!’ I was like no.. I don’t really have the time.. but our dear young boy was not willing to let his passenger leave without giving her proper change…. He made me wait for 10 minutes.. as he went about asking for change. Finally he came with the change and a sweet smile in his face.. that did help me lighten my moods.

In office.. though I did not expect things to be better.. I prayed it was fine.. but no.. I was asked to work on something really important which was supposed to be delivered by.. well the deadline was ASAP I put all my heart to it and gave it in no time only to realize the person who was in need of it would be in only after 3 hours… that JERK had called me up in the morning to ask me to do this idiotic thing which was needed only by 3.

Things got even worse by evening as someone pointed out that 12,000 Euro’s were missing in some dirty calculation in my report. I screwed my brains and the poor report for 2 hours, and still couldn’t find out where this 12,000 Euro’s was supposed to have disappeared… only to be informed by the useless user that she had deleted that particular record the previous night and forgot about the same when she ran the report… aaah.. man I was rather glad to hear the news.. no sorry.. no apologies.. jz an FYI..

It didn’t stop there.. night time when I was packing up.. another hero pings me and asks me to look into something.. I said I was leaving for the day.. and the reply comes.. Go home and login and ping me the details…. I reached home. Logged in.. only to discover that the hero in question has left for the day .. Height of irritation I must say.. I was so pissed with the entire set of events that happened today.. that I decided tomorrow am not going to snooze the alarm.

May God almighty help me stick to my decision!!

Achacha! You are still so much alive!!

2010-01-30T00:53:00.002+05:30

Jan 29^th 1988, the first time in my life.. I realized the pain of losing someone. Someone so dear to me.. it was hard for the child in me to accept the fact that I wouldn’t see him anymore.. I wouldn’t be sleeping besides him anymore… and he’s never ever gonna put me to sleep …

My grandfather was the person I loved the most as a child. I used to begin my days with the sight of his pleasant face… with a smile which made me feel I was the BEST girl in the world… and I would end my days sleeping besides him .. hugging him tight as his sweet lullaby’s swept me into deep slumber.

He was my favorite and I was his. We were so fond of each other that nothing else or rather no one else mattered to us at all. He used to feed me, bathe me, dress me…. And he was the only one who always said I was a nice girl J

22 years back, on this dreadful day I lost the most valuable person in my life. As usual he had put me to sleep.. but something in me wouldn’t let me sleep that night.. I still remember those last few moments I spent with him, cuz I never let myself forget those priceless moments which would never come back. It was rather unusual for me to not fall asleep that day… he tried to sing and put me to sleep but.. Somehow I was not sleepy that night.. Finally he put me on his shoulders and walked across the room… singing his all time favorite song.”Aaraaro.. areeraaeee achachante mole vaavaave.. Achachane nee thenalle.. aayiravalli povalle” and after a lot of struggle I managed to fall asleep.

It must have been the early hours of 29^th when I woke up. I felt very uneasy... so unlike the usual days... everything seemed strange from the previous night. To my grandma’s surprise I woke up and went and lied down by her side.. I’ve never done that till that day… I still couldn’t sleep.. and I was strangely feeling afraid of something.. Something was wrong or scary but I didn’t know what.. so I told her I would like to go n sleep with Amma, again a very unusual request from me who always preferred to be with Achacha.. even if Amma wants me to be with her…

She took me upstairs and I lied down besides mom as she came down to sleep.. Within a few minutes.. I heard my Maama shout “Kunnechi.. Achchan!!!” My Mom jumped out of the bed calling out for her dear father as she came down the stairs.. I ran behind onfused….

My Maama had rushed for a doctor as my mom sat numb besides her father and my Granny… as the doctor came he asked us to move out of the room and once he was out.. he broke the news that my dear dear Grandpa passed away in his sleep 15 minutes back.

Being a 6 year old kid.. I didn’t really understand what he said… but I knew something was wrong as I looked at him.. lying still.. not moving … MY Granny broke into sobs and my sister followed suite.. I too started crying.. cuz I didn’t know what to do then… by evening our house was full of people.. relatives wailing.. mom as still as a statue with a lost expression in her face… and someone told me I wouldn’t see him anymore… she said I should go and take his blessings before he leaves.. I started crying when I heard he wouldn’t come back.. and she said its just that you won’t be seeing him anymore.. but he will always be around when you need him.

Oh yes she was right!! Ever since that day I never saw him physically.. but I always see him in my mind. Each time I think of him. I still see him and look out for him when am in trouble. For quite a few years he was my God! I used to pray to him while the rest of my cousins pray to the God! I still think of him when am confused about life. I just need to think of him and I would get the right answer to al my questions.. You might term it as hallucination.. but for me.. he has always helped me in taking all the right decisions in my life…. He has always stopped me from doing the wrong things.. and he still remains very much alive deep down my heart. Its been 22 years since I ‘ve seen him.. but his face is still fresh in my mind each time I think of him… its just that I can’t really see him…. But I know he’s still there somewhere… and always will be there.. for me

The Spark in my eyes

2010-01-26T01:28:00.001+05:30

Being myself is something which I've missed over the past few years. Life in the corporate world has played its part in tranforming myself into a new me.. Someone whom I don't recognize anymore. Every night as I wish myself good night.. though I get a sweet smile in return..I see something missing....and I saw that special something right now.. right here ... and I wish and hope I could keep it with me.. forever like before...

Thank You Sree and Shalu!! the 2 of the most blessed gifts God ever gifted me with! A few hours is all that I got.. but it was worth it all.. thats all it took to bring back the sparkle in my eyes. I must say.. I need to meet you guys more often than before... cuz its very much needed to get me back to myself.. to get back the sparkle in my eyes :) Love you always!!!

A little attitude

2010-01-21T22:54:00.002+05:30

I must say at times I end up showing a little attitude to the wrong person.Here's a small description of one such small incident :-)

Who ever's been in hyd would be well aware of the Shared Rickshaw system we have here... the cheapest means of transport in hyd.. As any otherr s/w professionals in Hi tec city.. even I prefer shared Ricks as my means to commute to office.. As usual I was waiting outside Shilpa Park waiting for a shared Rick to pass by. Being the peak hour for the one's of my crowd.. almost every rick that passed by was full..

Finally after waiting for 5 minutes I saw one rick pass by. I thanked my stars as the rick stopped even before I waved for it. As I walked towards it and asked "Bhaiyya Cyber Towers??" he stared back at me and signalled me to get in. As I jumped in I noticed the other occupant wore a genpact tag and was trying to be friendly. As usual I was full of airs.. huh.. why should I talk to this stranger and I stared outside waiting for my destination to arrive.

As the Rick reached Cyber Towers, I asked the Rickshaw wala to stop, that's when the person besides me started talking
He : "You are heading for Cyber Gateways right?? This rick is headed for the same place you may get down over there"

Me : Oh.. okie... eh.. excuse me but.. I never knew we get shared Ricks which goes all the way to CGW
He : Eh.. well.. actually, I gave my car for repair and took a straight Rick to office.. I saw you on the way and since we were heading for the same place.. I asked the rickshaw wala to stop by.

I was left with no words. Here is someone.. whom I didn't even know (and am sure even he wouldn't be knowing me) who was trying to help me and I was being nasty and showing attitude forget about being nice to him.

Me : Ah.. well.. he stopped and when I asked him CTW.. he said yes.. and I thought it was a shared rick.. really sorry.. I didn't realize that/.. am really sorry didn't mean to offend you or something.. you see the thing is.. I'm such an introvert... (well I had to say that to save my face)

He : hey thats ok.. its absolutely fine.. thought so when you got in and didn't acknowledge :-)
Me : Ah.. by the way I'm Sigma.. nice to meet you
He : Yea I know.. my name is ...... :)

I was all smiles to all the strangers who passed by me in the cafeteria that day. Some would have found it odd. But that was all I could do to make up for being so nasty... earlier that day . cuz am not usually that bad to people.. Ask anyone who works in my floor.. I always give a smile to anyone who passes by. and thats why I said.. at times.. I show wrong attitude to wrong people...

Mummy.....Yummy.....Tummy

2010-01-06T23:56:00.001+05:30

Just back from a month long vacation and you can guess how it feels to be on your own when you've spent one whole month with your family. As usual I was lying on my bed and my mind was running images of how it would have been had I not come back. Must've have been playing with my lil niece or pulling a gag at my Sis along with my BIL :) hugging Mamma tight and fall into deep slumber feeling secured and protected....

As my thoughts kept wandering, I realized what I was missing the most. I needn't talk about my Mom's culinery skills to those friends of mine who has been blessed enough to have her food. To the remaining unfortunate one's.. am sorry you are missing some real good food in your life :P . I couldn't help but think about those wonderful delicacies I had...and how I miss them :(

Mom, come to me.. and cook something.. anything... am yearning for it..
The Yummy food which my Mummy makes which is best suited for my ever hungry Tummy :)

P.S. Mom its not just for the love for your food.. I want you here cuz your presence makes the darkest of my days bright :*

Fill in the blanks

2009-12-30T23:14:00.002+05:30

Fill in the blanks with the most appropriate word.

1.A diamond, unlike coal, is a ________ that has certain specific properties that can be determined and rated.

2.________ rocks have multiple colors because they are made from various fragments as well as animal and plant remains.

I know there are quite a few people out there who would have loved this part of the question paper like me. Atleast I needn't awaken the creative part of my brain to write a few sentences which meant the same, but sounded different enough to make the examiner feel that I knew everything about the answer in question ;-)

Today as I sat on that chair waiting for the dentist to fill the gaps between my teeth.. I couldn't help but relate the situation with the fill in the blanks question we used to have for our examz :P
As the student in question(a well known dentist) came all set for the examination, and went through the blanks in the question, I wasn't really sure if he would get everything right. He finished his examination in 2 hours, though the TAT was 1 hour. That left me thinking was it that hard a blank to fill.

Ma'am please have a look and let me know if this is fine.As I searched for the blanks..I gave hime a smile.. .He had filled the most appropriate fillers in those blanks spaces between my teeth so well.. he knew what to do with each and every space that was present and he did a great job. It was so fine that no one could really make out the difference until they sat and observed it for looong.. of course my Big Sis is known for her skills and did finally agree there is some change...

Gladly I reward him full marks (I must say full fees) and I gave it with a smile...a smile more prettier than the one I had before.

And if you still haven't figured out the right words for the fill in the blanks question... here are the answers :P
1 Mineral
2 Sedimentary

The last and final call

2009-12-25T00:04:00.003+05:30

"This is the Last and final call for the 100m Sprint.... participants please report to the starting point"

With bated breath I walked towards the starting point. I could feel my mouth go dry.. my knees growing weaker with every step I took.

I've been there and done that before... soo many times.. but each time I go through the same ordeal. As though it were the first time though it was just a matter of a few seconds. I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize that I've reached my destination.

I was not really happy to see my fellow athletes who've come to cheer me up."Relax... you look like your going to puke" someone whispered
Relax huh?? you expect me to relax when I see the expectation in each of your eyes?? Ah.. they blew the whistle again.. reminding me its time to pick one of those tokens to know you lane.
Somebody shouted at me "Hey you.. you are on lane 1"Phew.. "Daz nice..you can cover up over the curves"
I told myself as I walked to the lane and stood near the starting line.

On your marks... get set.... Go...

At the sound of the rifle.. I plunged forward with all my might.. ran for my life.. and finished.. Everything happened so fast...thats it.. and I did win the race like other times...

Soo much of drama in my mind for those very few seconds..as though it were the run for my life.. but I know it definitely wasn't the Last and Final Call of my life!!